“They” say that it’s never a good idea to have BOTH spouses retire at the same time. Husband and I took that advice to heart and now 6 years later; husband has finally done the deed! (Or so it appears…) It took him a few false starts and tons of procrastination, so rather than leaping into this phase, he took 6 years of baby steps towards the edge of the cliff! The point is- he finally retired on Jan. 1st, just before his 69th birthday arrived. (… Or did he?)

You may be asking yourself how that’s going for this spousal team? Well, let’s just say, there isn’t a clear picture yet, as they took off immediately on a road trip to San Diego to board a cruise ship through the Panama Canal and dock in Fort Lauderdale. BUT WAIT, that’s NOT all- oh no, from there they drove to Tampa for a couple of nights before boarding a different cruise line for another 7 days, in order to snorkel in Belize, Puerto Costa Maya, and Cozumel. BUT WAIT, that’s NOT all… Next, a flight would be taken back to San Diego to pick up their car and drive out to Palm Desert to meet up with friends and enjoy some desert hiking for another 10 days. And eventually, they’d retreat back up the Pacific Coastline at a leisurely pace towards home on Vancouver Is. The drive home has nothing reserved along the way, as husband seriously wants to do it slowly… Could he possibly be suffering from RETIREMENT ANXIETY?

What might this phase actually look like once they actually arrive home and he isn’t conducting business from 6:00 am in his home office throughout the week? Can someone who has worked as intensely as he has throughout his entire life, actually stop COLD TURKEY?

Wife admits, she had her own issues at retirement, so she’s aware that he’s going to have a challenge finding his way as he embarks on this new journey. One must seek their own path towards making this phase as much fun and fulfilling, as possible. The wake-up mantra of, “Today is going to be productive and wonderful.” is necessary to set the tone of this new life phase. The tricky part is going to be in melding the perception and goals of wife’s vision for retirement with that of husband’s. One might perceive a little rockiness in the beginning, don’t you think?

Husband has a sneaking suspicion that his wife may have secret plans that she’s sitting on… and he could be right…. (Certainly his home office needs redecorated and there is that niggling “To Do List” that requires their attention!)

Wife visualizes a life style of more involvement in their community, more socializing with friends and family, more time to play and enjoy their sailboat, and quality time to pursue their varied interests. (So he’s not into ZUMBA?!) Husband, who hauled his iPad Mini, Surface, iPhone, and digital camera along on this retirement cruise, may have a somewhat different vision. (In fact, I guarantee this independent spirit doesn’t share the same daydream, whatsoever!)

Now why would wife be suspicious of husband’s ability to completely shut down his work life? Well, let’s see… could an indicator be that throughout his retirement cruise, he’s already monitoring and advising one of the three people who took over his work portfolio? And what of his former boss who is engaging in a new business pursuit of which he’s already begun working at reeling husband into to set up and establish its operations.

Fully retired? Hmmmm…. Yet to be determined…                  


Keep checking on TENDER TUESDAYS for the next installment to SURVIVING MY HUSBAND’S RETIREMENT! I’m sure you have many humorous tales of your own… and maybe even some that aren’t quite so funny! I’d love you to share them by clicking below and leaving a comment. Any survival advice you can offer will be appreciated…

3 Responses »

    • We seem to be getting the hang of this ISLAND TIME thing… 3 hours at a time in Dr.’s offices, forgetting to set the alarm clock, … AH….Retirement!

      • Who else would have that kind of time? Actually on our ‘free time’ this morning we attended a workshop on Leaving Well…. you know the end of life sort of stuff.. funerals.. wills…. etc… you might get to do that one day too…. Ha!

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